I’ve Tried Everything!

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“I’ve tried everything! Nothing’s working. Now what?”

Momma, you are not alone! I’ve been here many times before! What do we do when all else fails? Scream into your pillow? Yes. No… Well, sometimes.

Although at times it seems as if I have depleted all parenting wisdom and resources, I’ve found it’s often the simple, tried and true basics of Christian parenting that works true wonders.

I’d like to share with you my simple “list” of

 Five Daily Momma Deeds to Always Do

1. Hug – I don’t care if your child is 1 or 21, they need your hugs! Hug them when they are happy, sad, moody, and even angry. Hug your child everyday! Hug before and after a long day. Hug when you feel like it and when you don’t. So much healing can come from a simple hug. I’ve found the teen years to be a time a child desperately needs these gracious embraces.

2. Pray – Not only be praying for your child each day, but pray with them! Regularly ask them how you can be praying for them. Be ready to stop and pray in the middle of a stressful battle, a disagreement, or any problem that arises. This can be so powerful as you humble yourself, join hands with your child and ask for God’s help. As I write this, I’m reminded of how dramatically this has made all the difference in my home.

Say a prayer as you drop them off at school. Pray together for someone in need. Pray for your church and for The Church. I love praying for the weekend church services with my kids as we drive to our local church!

3. Listen – Take it from me who has learned from many dumb mistakes. You may have amazing words of wisdom to share with your child but they will not have the mind or heart to truly hear you if they don’t feel heard first. LISTEN. Try not to be too quick to judge what they say. They may be sorting out the wrong before you hear them say the good and right. BE PATIENT. DON’T INTERRUPT. BREATHE. Affirm that you’ve heard them by saying something like, “I can understand why you feel this way.” “This must be hard for you.” or “I get what you are saying.” Listening in this way can create beautiful, strong relational bridges for your future together.

4. Train – Yep. Train up that child in the way they should go! I’m talking about teachable moments – be ready because they are ever present! You are your child’s main teacher. Teach them God’s Word daily! Are they 4 or 14? It doesn’t matter! Teach them about His Creation. Train them in Who God is. Teach them about the traps of this World. Train them by your humble example.

Train with consistent discipline. This is hard work but don’t grow weary! Create clear boundaries with established consequences. This will take out the emotional guesswork. Keep to KINDNESS and rely on the Holy Spirit. Even still, you’ll mess up so be ready to seek their forgiveness!

5. Smile – Smile at your child. Smile around your child. Laugh too, if you can! Just a simple smile can bring sunshine to brighten a burdened soul. Your emotional mood can lift up or weigh down your child’s tender heart. Smile whether you feel like it or not. Studies have shown that we feel happier when we smile. Give God thanks for your child and His grace and just smile.

I’d like to encourage you to write down these 5 Daily Momma Deeds to Always Do and ask God where you need to grow.

How can I pray for or encourage you?

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13 thoughts on “I’ve Tried Everything!

  1. Thank you for these timely reminders! I am so hopeful for a parenting book/workshop/conference/anything by you & Craig. Appreciate you charing your family with so many.

  2. I love this. Thank you. So practical. I always need wisdom. Sometimes it’s hard to keep up on all the teachable moments that come and maintain a smile and a good attitude. Gods been working with me on that. How timely this was. 💛

  3. Hello! I just found out you had a blog on your Instagram! I love this and whole heartedly agree! I’m a pastors wife and mom of 3 under 5 yrs old from Bristol, CT! My biggest struggle lately is patience! I consider myself a very patient person and people have actually told me before how patient I am, but sometimes the chaos just takes over and I don’t know the best way to calm myself down but still get the point across that the behavior is unacceptable.

  4. Good advice, Amy. My Mom was really good about smiling. She always greeted me with a smile, even during her days at the Care Center. I really miss that.

  5. Thanks for reminding us. There’s a reason they are the basics. Everyone tries to skirt them, but they’re essential. I always come back to them! A hug, smile, and just general tenderness toward my growing children softens hearts all around and makes the necessity of prayer and forgiveness easier to accomplish. In fact, I blew it yesterday and had to come back to these principles again. Praying God uses our weaknesses and mistakes to show our children HIS grace and mercy and patience, even when I haven’t shown mine!

  6. Thank you for this wisdom. I listen to LifeChurch podcasts, but just looked you up as I’m considering bringing up the idea of homeschooling our relatively newly adopted daughters. I appreciate you sharing your insights as being a new mom can get frustrating.

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